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Anger Management Secret: How to Overcome Fear and Anger Quickly
Most people, especially women, have been taught it is bad or weak to have needs. We have been trained to ignore or discount our wants and desires.
This always backfires.
Wants and desires are innate mechanisms to keep us alive and evolving. It would be like repressing your breath, heart beat or digestion and still expecting to live a full, happy, healthy life.
Every human being has needs, all the time.
We all have the exact same needs. Every need that you have, the people you see as enemies or “wrong” also have. The only people who don’t have needs are dead.
We all need respect, safety, nourishment, harmony, connection and love to name a few.
What Few People Know About Anger
Anger is a sign that “blame thinking” is going on in your head, and you have unmet needs.
If your blame statement was, “She never listens to me,” what emotions or body sensations would you feel?
Would you feel anxious, sad, rage, frustration or confused?
Depending on the situation, you might be happy this person is ignoring you.
So the act of being ignored does not always cause lower level emotions.
If you were speeding in your car and drove by a police officer, you might be happy if she ignored you.
So being ignored is not always something that triggers anger or blame. It is how you think about the situation that triggers the anger or blame.
Posted by Lori Prokop
